All About Trey

Life, Travel, Adventure

Trey circa 1985 (or when I was young)


Here I am at age 18. I've graduated from high school and I was getting ready to go the Naval Academy. Dad and I flew to North Carolina and then drove up to DC and finally made our way to Annapolis. Induction Day (I-Day) was July 2nd 1985. I had no idea what I was getting myself into. Sure I had heard my Dad's stories of West Point, and some stories from my sister about the Air Force Academy, but I don't think any of us really understood what lay before us: marching, formations, chow calls, inspections, rates, "training", etc. Oh, and school, and some sort of sports.

This is the my plebe photo from the Naval Academy. Gee, I was really thin back then.

Like Athena Springing Forth from Zeus' Forehead . . . .

I'm hoping some hot, muscled Greek God will spring from the amazingly gigantic and quite disturbing ZIT on my chin. Seriously, I think you could see if from space. It's that big. Oh, the irony, as I approach 40 I'm breaking out like a teenager. Just BITE ME, okay?

Even the Dr. I saw today was scared of it and gave me some antibiotics. What fun. Anyways, I went to get a physical since I haven't had one since I left the Navy over five years ago. Gee, time flies when you're having fun. So in addition to being the human pin cushion, I got the ole prostrate check as well. He was so quick I didn't even have a chance to enjoy it. I wonder if it's bad form to bring poppers to your prostrate exam?

Here are some pics of Paris.



















Speaking of irony, the pleather man bag I bought in Paris? Guess what's it's called in French? Queer Sack. I kid you not. It's really Cuir Sac, but it's pronounced Queer Sack. How funny is that. And so perfect for me, right?

Alternate Ending 2

Washington Post
November 25, 2006

CDR (Insert Real Name, IRN for short), United States Navy, was killed today in Iraq. CDR IRN was killed by a improvised explosive device (IED) in a routine transit from Baghdad to Al Basrah in southern Iraq. CDR IRN, also known as Trey, was a 1989 graduate of the U.S. Naval Academy and also recieved a Master of Arts in National Security Studies from Georgetown University. His first duty assignment was on board the USS Reeves (CG-24) and then he served several tours at various Navy communications commands. After a successful career in telecommunications and information systems, CDR IRN was selected into the Navy's Foreign Area Officer program specializing in North Africa and the Middle East. After serving as the Assistant Naval Attache at the U.S. Embassy in Tunesia, CDR IRN attended the Defense Language Institute in Monterrey CA where he studied Arabic. Upon completion of his training, CDR IRN was stationed in Bahrain and Qatar before he was deployed to southern Iraq to support the rebuilding of the Iraqi Navy and port security for Al Basra, Iraq's main port. CDR IRN is survived by his son, IRN IV, who lives with his mother in Virigina. CDR IRN is also survived by his parents who live in Colorado, and his sister who lives in California.

Hurry Up and Wait

Arrive at Charles De Gaulle Airport, Paris France. Local Time 550AM.
- Wait in line to get boarding pass.
- Wait in line to go through passport control.
- Wait in line to check baggage.
- Wait in line to go through security.
- Wait to board plane to Zurich.
- Plane departs at 8AM local time.

Arrive Zurich Airport at 910AM local time.
- Wander through shopping area to kill time.
- Look at insanely expensive clothes.
- Wait for train to go to the E Terminal.
- Wait in line for check in for flight to IAD.
- Wait in line for additional security check.
- Wait to board plane to DC.
- Plane departs at 1145 local time.

Arrive IAD, Washington DC at 300PM local time.
- Wait for arrival gate to be available.
- Exit the plane and trek through the narrow arrival corridors.
- Wait for mobile lounges to take us to passport control.
- Wait in line at pass port control.
- Wait for luggage to arrive.
- Wait in line for customs inspection.
- Exit Dulles Airport.

Greekboy picked me up and brought me home.

So what did you do today?

Happy Thanksgiving!

Bonjour from Paris! Today is Thanksgiving and I had pizza for lunch and pasta for dinner. I tried to get my carb fix in Jimbo, I really tried!

Let's see yesterday my sister, bnl, and I went to the Musee du Rodin. Definitely interesting and I now understand why there are so many replicas of the The Thinker and how they are all original pieces. After the museum, we hit the Marais for lunch at this little restaurant that specialized in tarts and quiches. Quite good and then we shopped a bit. After bnl went home to pick up the kiddos, my sister and I went to the US Embassy (very cool) and then walked/shopped our way up the Champs Elysee. I found some very cool coats, but even an XL here is too small for me. (Note to self: I must start my diet when I get back!) My sister didn't like the Matrix looking coats, but I did. And then finally in the last shop I broke down and bought a man bag (purse, whatevah!). I hate my backpack because it screams american touriste in the worst way. But I want to carry my camera, my tour book, etc. So the answer is the man bag. It's pleather, but good quality plether. Plus this way if I decide the man bag look isn't for me, then I haven't dropped a bundle on a nice leather bag that I'll never use.

Today I hit the Musee d'Orsay and the excellent impressionist collection they have. I really like Renoir, Sisley, and then the dot guys: Seurat, and Segat I think. Afterwards, I hooked up with my sister and her family and we trekked across town looking for a pizza place. Not a good thing to do with small hungry children. But we finally struck gold and found a pizza place. Afterwards, we walked a bit more and then the bnl took the kiddos home and my sister and I went to Notre Dame. Afterwards, we stood in line in the rain for almost an hour (it was MISERABLE) to see the Doisneau exhibit. But the exhibit was great. Afterwards we trekked home for dinner. If it has stopped raining, I may go out tonight, but we'll see.

Au Revoir!

Musee de Louvre 101

Or 8 centuries in three hours. That's what I would call it. Yes I'm sure all of those Rick Steve fanatics would be motified by my sprint through the Louvre, but really, most of the signs are in French, so it's not like I'm going to be doing a lot of reading about the huge stone horses from Persia.

But let's back up. I almost slept through the night, and then sort of tossed and turned a bit until I heard the kiddos up. I walked with the BNL (brother-in-law) to the bus stop for the kids and saw them off. It was still dark, and more than a bit brisk, so I decided to curl up with my book while he went running. When he got back, I went for a quick jog. I haven't been running in awhile, so it kind of sucked. But I got back, showered, and changed and then after a thorough briefing from BNL I headed out. I navigated the Metro like a champ, but then got confused in the tunnels and missed the secret underground entrance to the Louvre. Which was fine as I got to go in through the glass pryamid which I think is really cool. After getting my ticket, I started off. Greek, Roman, Etruscans, Persian, Islamic, and that was just the basement and the ground floor. It was packed, which was expected since the weather was crappy outside, but not too crazy. For all of my frantic pace, I did stop and linger over some things. But without a lot of signs in english, and I refuse to do the audio tours, there wasn't much for me to study. To be honest with you, I'm not wild over the whole Venus De Milo. And it's not a gay thing, I just don't see what's the big deal. And it was hard to see if since it was surrounded 8 people deep. Now having said that, I saw some really nice butts, and 6 pack abs. Not rock hard, try marble hard! Yep, love those Greeks! I did the obligatory run by the Mona Lisa as well. And it was packed. My issue with Grand Hall, is how many paintings of Madonna and child do you need? It just gets kind of boring. And I know most art majors are probably cringing, but deal.

Afterwards I wanted to cross over to the Latin Quarter and get some lunch. As I left the Lourve, it had started to drizzle a bit and it was kind of cool to be wandering along the Seine in the grey, cold, and drizzle. Seriously, I really liked it. I crossed over the Seine and made my way to the Latin Quarter where I found this alley with like 10 gyro restaurants in it. They were good and cheap. I think I had a gyro, fries, and a soda for a little over 6E. I then wanted to walk over to the Marais, the gay neighborhood. But the drizzle had turned into a rain at this point and it was just coming down. And me with no umbrella. I made it to the Marais and found a clothes store to pop into. It was definitely a twink shop. I saw a large shirt that might have fit some orphan from Africa, but definitely not me. I left in disgust and made my way back to the Metro and my sister's house. I got back around the time the kiddos got home from school, so it was good timing. It was a relatively quiet night. At some point I should probably venture out for a taste of the nightlife, but I figure Monday probably wasn't the party night.

A funny thing happened on the way to the airport . . .

I left my laptop at the office. I had meant to bring it with me. Seriously. Yes to do some work, but to also sit in a little Parisean cafe and blog while I drink the strong coffee and smoke my crappy french cigarrettes. As if. But still, it could have been fun.

The flight was relatively painless and my brother in law picked me up at the airport. I forget how far north Paris is as it was dark until about 8AM, and then it starts to get dark around 5PM. But my first day was good. We got to my sister's apartment which is sweet! It's huge and definitely in the high rent district about a 1/4 mile from the Arc de Triumph. After I got situated, we went to my nephew's last soccer game. It was sunny, but cold, and after awhile the wind really made me wish for my jacket. It was the last game of the season and it was funny to see all of the kids and their parents there. I felt a little like Mr. No Karma, aka the soccer Dad. After the game, we had lunch and then I succumbed to a much needed nap. When I awoke, we walked to the Trocadero which is this plaza/garden right across the river from the Eiffel Tower. Great views and then we crossed the Seine and walked about the Tower grounds a bit. But my niece started to get tired (which you can tell when she proceeds to have a hissy fit) so we didn't stay that long. But I got some amazing photos with my crappy camera that I'll post when I get back.

Today my sister and I took a quick trip to one of the local markets which was awesome. All sorts of fresh food, fish, flowers, and all sorts of clothes and stuff. Then we came back and headed to the science museum. First we had lunch at Quick (which is the French equivalent of McDonalds). Amidst a crowd of screaming children. And then we wandered through the museum which was interesting and kept my neice and nephew entertained. Then a quick trip to the play ground there with this huge slide for children, and then the long train ride back. I took another nap, but no so much. A nice, relatively quiet dinner with my sister and her family. It was all good. The food in restaurants here is not cheap at all. The dollar-euro conversion sucks. So eating in is actually the best thing to do.

I think I'm going to break off on my own tomorrow and hit the Louvre in the AM, and then walk around Marais, the gay district, in the afternoon. Au revior for now!

"Aggressive Interogation Techniques"

Or AITs as I'm sure they are known. Because torture is just too simple of a word.

So, finally, some proof that Bush did sign specific memos authorizing torture. If the Wash Post and New York Times are to be believed. Which is entirely debatable to some of my classmates who are still in the liberal, MSM, bashing mode. The question I have yet to ask is why they think the Wall Street Journal, the Washington Times, Fox News, or even the Drudge Report hasn't broken any of the major new stories about the government and this administration breaking the laws of our country. Oh they will pick up on the bandwagon eventually, but usually only to hype the danger posed by the revealing of these "secrets." I hope the ACLU wins their fight and we finally get to see these memos.

As the NYTimes said today: "Americans have a right to know what standards their president has been applying to the treatment of prisoners. The nation’s image is at stake, as well as the safety of every man and woman who is fighting Mr. Bush’s so-called war on terror."

Alternate Ending 1

New York Times
December 5, 1991

(Insert Real Name, IRN for short), died today of AIDS related infections at New York University Medical Center a week before his 25th birthday. Trey, as he was known, had attended the United States Naval Academy for over two years before he was kicked out for being gay. Upon his expulsion from the Naval Academy, Trey moved to New York City and briefly attended New York University as a part time student. He would drop out of NYU after just one semester due to severe depression, a condition which would plagued him until his death. Friends and neighbors of the Greenwich Village resident said that Trey was a quiet, friendly, person who never caused any problems. Mr. (IRN) is survived by his estranged parents who live in Colorado, and his sister who lives in Ohio.

T Minus 30 and Counting . . . . . .

Yep, there are just 30 days till I turn Forty. The big 4-OH. Or the big 4-Over the Hill. And I'm not sure how I feel about it all. Should I be worried, depressed, upset, happy? What is the correct emotion I should be feeling right now?

I've been trying to think about what I'm doing with my life. Well I would start to think about it, and then think of something else since I'm sure I don't want to really think about it.

My horoscope from MetroWeekly is eerily prescient: Sagittarius: You've climbed every mountain and forded every stream, and now you don't know where to go because the path of most resistance seems to have disappeared without a trace. Take your time. Enjoy being a little lost and at loose ends. Resolution comes suddenly.

I have felt lost for awhile. Just sort of plodding along. And it doesn't feel good. It feels like I'm missing something, so great opportunity just waltzed by while I was wandering aimlessly. I hope the resolution comes suddenly, but not painfully.

I think I'm going to start working on some new life goals. A new list to work off of. I want to learn a foreign language, I want to travel some more, I want to get a tatoo, I want to write a novel. Some of it I think will probably be beyond me, but maybe it's good to have some goals that are just too far out there, just so you can push yourself to see if you can reach that far.

One of my goals for this year was to lose some weight. And I didn't succeed. I've lifted, and I've done cardio, but my eating habits suck. And so I'm pretty much where I've been all year. Not really fat, not skinny by any stretch of the imagination, just sort of thick and stocky. But in a good way I tell myself. I'm really good at lying to myself.

Well I didn't want this to be a debbie downer post, becuase that would be so typical. And I really aspire for more. T Minus 30 and counting . . . . . .

3 People I Hate (Today's Edition)

1. The rocket scientist who thought it was a good idea to put a can of tuna fish into the "Eat Right" box that United sells. Because on a hot, bumpy, nauseating flight, what you really want to smell is the overwhelming odor of tuna.

2. The Washington Flyer Mafia thug who worked the desk at Dulles last night at 1AM. After assorted cancelled and delayed flights, alternative routings, and ending up at the wrong airport at 1AM, what I really need is some guy giving me a hard time when I'm just trying to get home, and yet somehow doing it with a condescending attitude. BITE ME!

3. The really hot guy at the gym today who would keep going to the mirror and lifting up his shirt to look at his 6 pack abs. Yep, they are still there. Yep, they are still there. Yep, they are still there.

Trying Again

Well I sent an email out to my class list about the fact that all 4 military papers (Army Times, Navy Times, Air Force Times, and Marine Corps Times) are calling for Rumsfeld resignation or firing. And this is what I get in response:

"As a follow-on to the comments already made, the plain and simple truth is that Donald Rumsfeld is executing his boss’s strategy. Since he is still on the job, one can only assume that the President believes that the SECDEF is doing a great job. Calls for his resignation are simply ludicrous. Rumsfeld keeps doing what the President wants him to do. Who’s going to replace him, and is that person going to be some amazing savior? I can only assume that what this editorial board really wants is someone who won’t follow the President’s orders, but then that person would ultimately be fired.


I find the naiveté and lack of objectivity of most editorial boards amusing, since I know they can’t really believe most of the stuff they write. Unfortunately, their one-dimensional view of the world, combined with their very loud mouthpiece, makes their naiveté also quite dangerous. That’s a nice touch at the bottom: “this is not about midterm elections.” What a riot! They must have had some great cocktail party discussions after writing that little disingenuous nugget."

Now, my first thought was to say, "I assume the President has told his Secretary of Defense to win the war, and that really hasn't happened yet." But instead of a short snappy emotional response, I tried the following:

"Well I won’t go into the timing of the piece. You can take their words at face value, or not. I have no knowledge or insight about them, so I can’t say. But if you want to talk about timing, I would say the timing of Saddam Hussein’s death sentence, or the fact that the report on the Foley page scandal is done but won’t be released for a couple of weeks, are just as suspect. Again, I don’t know since I don’t have any insight into those processes, but it’s easy to take a skeptical view on a lot of things these days.


I want to try to look at the Rumsfeld issue a bit different. I don’t have an MBA, so please bare with me on this analogy. I’m a shareholder in a company. The CEO continues to put out glowing reports of sales, revenues, and positive press announcements supporting his COO. For three year, the COO has briefed all of the market analysts on new prospects, new markets, emerging technologies. For three years the CEO has given the COO all of the tools and resources he needs to do his job. But after three years, the market analysts are looking at the results and not seeing the gains that the COO and the CEO have been talking about. In fact, they see the opposite.
The share holders have seen their shares continue to decrease in value, despite repeated promises for a quick rebound in stock prices. Individual division managers have disclosed secret company forecasts that show the COO continues to pursue ill advised strategies, isn’t using resources properly, etc. The just released internal memos contradict the positive statements
that the COO and CEO have made to the public, analysts, and shareholders. The shareholders are having their bi-annual shareholder meeting and while they cannot remove the CEO due to contractual reasons, they want to remove the COO for his failure to perform. While the CEO may be happy with the COO, shouldn’t the shareholders be able to ask for his resignation?


Again, I do not have an MBA, so there may be dozens of holes in my analogy. Feel free to point them out.


The last thing I will add is that tomorrow (Monday) is Pat Tillman’s
birthday. His brother wrote a very eloquent open letter that you can read
here:

http://www.truthdig.com/report/item/200601019_after_pats_birthday/"

It will be interesting to see if I get any positive responses. Or will I be flamed again for buying into that liberal, American hating, mind set again.

Schadenfreude and Sympathy

My first reaction to Pastor Ted was almost uncontrollable laughter. Coming from Colorado Springs, Christian conservative central, I just thought it was too funny. After all of the hateful things that these type of people say, to find out that it's not just the pot calling the kettle black, but involved drugs as well, well it was just too delicious for words. Of course the icing on top of the cake was that this came out just days before the mid-term elections. From a pure spin perspective, this was going to have journalists asking "Kerry who? What joke?" Oh yes, between the one-two punch of Foley and Haggard, the Republican party with their holier-than-thou "family values" mantra must be reeling. I know it's schadenfreude. I know it's wrong to take pleasure from this situation, but after all of the hurtful sayings, the double standards, the lies, the deliberate mis-representations, and above all the just insane hypocrisy, it does feel like a little bit of well earned karmic retribution.

But it is sad. Let's not forget that. If this man was not Pastor Ted, but just John Doe. If he was married with children and he was arrested let's say with a male prostititue (and let's just leave the drugs out of it), then I think it's easier to feel sympathy for the man. He's lived a lie for over half his life. He's built a family, but has to live this secret life on the side. Unlike say a mistress, something that some people may not be ashamed of, he's had to keep this secret, this life, all to himself. Being forced to come out at this point in his life is going to be hard. He probably has no support structure of friends or family to turn to. He's going to be all alone. (and it wouldn't be surprising if he turned to drugs) And he's not the only one who is going to suffer. His wife and children are also going to suffer. They are going to be forced into a new world, under strange and unfriendly scrutiny. It really is sad, and my heart goes out to them. They don't deserve the consequences of these actions. Andrew as always says it better than I.

The closet hurts alot of people. Not just the people trapped in it, but their loved ones as well. And that damage is doubled with they are forced out of the closet. But what is wrong with our society that forces some people to live a lie, to live half a life, to be ashamed of who they are and who they love. It's so sad.

It could have been me. In another parallel universe, I could be married, still in the Navy, and maybe have children by this point. And the lies, deceptions, and subterfuge to keep up appearances over the years, the many years, would have eventually eaten away at my soul and my mind. It's not hard to imagine that after while, something would snap inside and I would "act out" in a way that would probably be stupid, dangerous, and unhealthy. Maybe not, but maybe.

On a completely different note, last night in the cold, I walked down R St towards the Metro, hand in hand with someone special, and just felt as one with the universe. I felt the world spin when we kissed, and not just from the yummy winter mojito I had at Halo. After saying good-bye at the Metro, I walked home, still cold on the outside, but warm and happy inside.

Election Time Madness

It's ALL HATE, ALL THE TIME!!

We still have a week to go and I'm about to reach breaking point. Living in the eye of the storm, and giving a damn, makes a bad combination. So where to start?

Let's see. Sunday as I was dressing for church I happened upon Meet the Press with MD's senatorial candidates, Cardin and Steele. Now I know nothing about Cardin, and since I don't vote in Maryland that's okay. But Steele is definitely a prominent character. Him I know. But as Matt Russell pointed out, if you looked at his ads, his posters, his website, you wouldn't know that he was a Republican. Steele joked that he was being outed, but this intentional deception, is just typical of what is going on around the country by the Republicans. And then there was the "Steele Democrat" bumpersticker. How can that not be disingenous? And oh by the way, exactly what type of voters is Steele trying to fool into thinking that he's a democrat? Could it be the under educated, or under uninformed, that Steele is trying to dupe? How proud you must be to say that you've won becuase you've fooled people into thinking they voted for a black democrat?

Monday there was a great op-ed in the Post called The Decline of Trust. It's good article, but I don't think that it addresses some of the underlying reasons why we don't trust politicians anymore. For some reason, politics has become the land of zero tolerance for mistakes. You can't say that you were wrong. That maybe some action or opinion or decision was wrong. There's some strange fever that's gripped the political world where ANY admission of failure, of fallibility, or error, will some how become this pandora's box where EVERY decision will then be questioned, interrogated (but of course not via waterboarding) or judged in perfect 20-20 hindsight. The interesting resulting effect is that now politicians are in a position where they have to say that they were right, when there is all evidence to the contrary. Either the evidence is dismissed (no, we're WINNING in Iraq!), or there's some strange parsing of past statements that make Clinton's "It's depends' on what "is" is" comment seem quaint. Of course that distinguished parsing was about oral sex, which is obviously more important than say the reason we went to war in Iraq.

As part of my new, new, new . . . new gym routine, I've been going to the gym in the AM to do cardio. So I get stuck watching TV while I jam to my MP3 player. This morning, I swear that every commercial break had atleast one political ad. And I think I saw back to back Cardin, Erhlich, Allen ads. And none of them are pretty by the way. Especially the Allen ads. And I learned this little bit of info:

"The National Republican Senatorial Committee sank an astonishing $1,087,692.50 into the (Allen) race this morning alone, new FEC filings show. . . . Key footnote: The vast majority of the GOP money — $1,074,800 — will be spent on negative ads attacking Webb, rather than promoting Allen himself."

Nice. Of course this is from the party that purposely tries to reduce voter turnout via letters to immigrants in CA threating with deportation, or by jamming "get-out-the-vote" phone banks in Maine. While almost all of the nastiness I've described is being done by both Democrats and Republicans (though much more by the Republicans), I've yet to hear of any story where democrats are willfully, purposely, and more importantly illegally trying to prevent voters that might support the other party.

Let's think about that for a moment. To win an election in our great democracy, there are some elements of the Republican party that are purposely, willfully, and potentially illegally trying to get people either not to vote, or to confuse them so their vote doesn't match their intentions.

Nice.

Wasted Weekend

So this weekend has been a waste. Friday night it was pouring down rain and the thought of going out just didn't appeal to me at all. Plus I started to have a head ache that would curse me the entire weekend.

I got up Saturday morning with the best of intentions of working out, of doing work, of doing something. But this constant low grade headache, and my quasi-permanent state of fatigue, didn't really help. So after doing the minimal set of chores, I crawled into bed for a nap. Sort of tossed and turned. Got up and finally walked outside to Filene's Basement to buy some stuff. Walked back. Hit Whole Foods. And then I sort of channel surfed my way through the evening. I couldn't really watch anything since everyone was showing horror movies or some such crap. I did go out last night and what a mistake that was. Add a smokey bar to the fatigue and headache and you're not going to have a good time.

I did get two phone calls yesterday from friends. I love them both, but the questions I don't want someone, even my friends, to ask to me are:

- why aren't you happy?
- where do you want to be in three years?

Now sure they are perfectly reasonable questions that I would normally avoid them even if I wasn't feeling bad. But tired, and not feeling well, I quickly changed the subject.

I'm still feeling poorly and I'm not going to try to work on the happy question. But the other question does seem to drag on me. It kind of goes back to the post I had before. And I do find it amusing that what I said then is true. After the vacation I managed to push those thoughts and questions away for a time. I'm almost prescient. It's probably time to figure out where I'm going in this game called life.

Weekly Recap!

Well, it's been a very odd week and blogger's been finicky, so here's a quick recap of some stuff.

Reel Affirmations!
Loved it. I only saw 4 movies, but they were all good. I'll say my favorite was East Side Story. Just a great movie. Good plot, good acting, some really funny lines. I'll buy it when I can. Now, not every movie can have a good plot, or good acting. The case in point being Eating Out 2: Sloppy Seconds. Now wait, I know you're trying to figure out what E. M. Forester classic this was based off of, but I'm sad to report that while it's not based on a classic, it's also not a classic. A little bit formulaic, but still funny, and what it lacked in plot, acting, dialogue, (insert almost any quality trait), it made up for in good ole fashion skin. Oh yes, there was plenty of nudity (full frontal thank you very much) and shirtless men to make this a secret guilty pleasure.

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So I got a letter from the company building my new condo. They say that they are actually ahead of schedule. Sure. I'll believe it when I see it. To be honest, the longer it takes to get built, the more time there is for the housing market to turn around. Here's a current pic of my new condo at the corner of hip and fabulous.

If you look closely you can see where the concrete kind of recesses. That's where the loft looks down into the living room. Kind of cool.

What's not cool is that I've been looking at the new condos that were built at the other end of the block. People are just now moving into them and from the opposite side of the street you can totally see into their condo. I do not need some interior decorating queen doing a walking assessment of my condo on her way to Whole Foods. "Oh gurl, what was she thinking? That shade of cumin was soooo last year." Cumin's a spice, not a color, right? But you get the picture.

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So I had a little pre-High Heel Race wine and cheese thing. It was great and I can't believe that we polished off over 8 bottles of wine. But we were well fortified for the cold. We left an hour before the race started, but they were already six deep by the time we wandered over to 17th St. Here's a pic of some of the ladies! "Love your hair, hope you win!"

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And then there's New Jersey. The New Jersey Supreme Court unanimously ruled Wednesday that its state constitution requires same-sex couples to be given the same set of marital rights and privileges granted to opposite-sex married couples. But the court, by a 4-3 margin, rejected the claim that same-sex couples have a constitutional right to have their relationships recognized as "marriages," ruling instead that only the Legislature has the power to decide whether the institution of marriage in New Jersey should include same-sex couples. It's nice to know that the someone understands that GLBT Americans, citizens, tax payers, deserve equal rights and protections for their loved ones. The success wasn't total. It's not marriage. NJ can call it what they want, but it's got to afford the same protections and benefits as marriage. It will be interesting to see where this goes in NJ and what they will be called. We didn't win the race here, but I think we're leading the pack and need to finish strong to win the race.

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And the quote of the day from Adam & Steve:

"I may be damaged goods, but I'm goods none the less!"

It's not just me

The firey rebuke I got from my classmate about torture still bothers me. I lack good hard evidence, and obviously you can't believe everything you read, but I still think that what we are doing is wrong on so many levels. And I'm saddened by any lack of real discussion on this on my class mailing list. I almost just want to unsubscribe sometimes. And then earlier this week I read this and I know that it's not just me.

After Pat’s BirthdayPat and Kevin Tillman Courtesy the Tillman Family

Pat Tillman (left) and his brother Kevin stand in front of a Chinook helicopter in Saudi Arabia before their tour of duty as Army Rangers in Iraq in 2003.

By Kevin Tillman

Editor’s note: Kevin Tillman joined the Army with his brother Pat in 2002, and they served together in Iraq and Afghanistan. Pat was killed in Afghanistan on April 22, 2004. Kevin, who was discharged in 2005, has written a powerful, must-read document.



It is Pat’s birthday on November 6, and elections are the day after. It gets me thinking about a conversation I had with Pat before we joined the military. He spoke about the risks with signing the papers. How once we committed, we were at the mercy of the American leadership and the American people. How we could be thrown in a direction not of our volition. How fighting as a soldier would leave us without a voice… until we get out.

Much has happened since we handed over our voice:

Somehow we were sent to invade a nation because it was a direct threat to the American people, or to the world, or harbored terrorists, or was involved in the September 11 attacks, or received weapons-grade uranium from Niger, or had mobile weapons labs, or WMD, or had a need to be liberated, or we needed to establish a democracy, or stop an insurgency, or stop a civil war we created that can’t be called a civil war even though it is. Something like that.

Somehow our elected leaders were subverting international law and humanity by setting up secret prisons around the world, secretly kidnapping people, secretly holding them indefinitely, secretly not charging them with anything, secretly torturing them. Somehow that overt policy of torture became the fault of a few “bad apples” in the military.

Somehow back at home, support for the soldiers meant having a five-year-old kindergartener scribble a picture with crayons and send it overseas, or slapping stickers on cars, or lobbying Congress for an extra pad in a helmet. It’s interesting that a soldier on his third or fourth tour should care about a drawing from a five-year-old; or a faded sticker on a car as his friends die around him; or an extra pad in a helmet, as if it will protect him when an IED throws his vehicle 50 feet into the air as his body comes apart and his skin melts to the seat.

Somehow the more soldiers that die, the more legitimate the illegal invasion becomes.

Somehow American leadership, whose only credit is lying to its people and illegally invading a nation, has been allowed to steal the courage, virtue and honor of its soldiers on the ground.

Somehow those afraid to fight an illegal invasion decades ago are allowed to send soldiers to die for an illegal invasion they started.

Somehow faking character, virtue and strength is tolerated.

Somehow profiting from tragedy and horror is tolerated.

Somehow the death of tens, if not hundreds, of thousands of people is tolerated.

Somehow subversion of the Bill of Rights and The Constitution is tolerated.

Somehow suspension of Habeas Corpus is supposed to keep this country safe.

Somehow torture is tolerated.

Somehow lying is tolerated.

Somehow reason is being discarded for faith, dogma, and nonsense.

Somehow American leadership managed to create a more dangerous world.

Somehow a narrative is more important than reality.

Somehow America has become a country that projects everything that it is not and condemns everything that it is.

Somehow the most reasonable, trusted and respected country in the world has become one of the most irrational, belligerent, feared, and distrusted countries in the world.

Somehow being politically informed, diligent, and skeptical has been replaced by apathy through active ignorance.

Somehow the same incompetent, narcissistic, virtueless, vacuous, malicious criminals are still in charge of this country.

Somehow this is tolerated.

Somehow nobody is accountable for this.

In a democracy, the policy of the leaders is the policy of the people. So don’t be shocked when our grandkids bury much of this generation as traitors to the nation, to the world and to humanity. Most likely, they will come to know that “somehow” was nurtured by fear, insecurity and indifference, leaving the country vulnerable to unchecked, unchallenged parasites.

Luckily this country is still a democracy. People still have a voice. People still can take action. It can start after Pat’s birthday.

Brother and Friend of Pat Tillman,

Kevin Tillman

I wish I wasn't in such august company.

Something *Fresh*

Walking back from Lincoln Theatre last night in the fog and light drizzle, I passed Halo as a group of twinks came stumbling out the door.

"Ohhhh GURL! Tell me what happened! I need something FRESH for my blog." I could almost see the theatrical snaps going off in the background.

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The Pet Shop Boys RULE!! Andrews does a great job describing the concert. A friend and I went and we had the most awesome box seats. Great view, but little dancing room which was the only downer. Great music. An amazing set of new and old music. Someone one said that the PSB make "sad music happy, and happy music sad." And it's true. A lot of their up tempo songs aren't very upbeat, and some of their slow, down-temp songs, are actually quite happy and positive. Constitution Hall was a great venue, small enough to be intimate, but large enough to hold a decent size crowd. Probably the best concert I've seen in years.

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R.I.P Habeous Corpus.



To quote the PSB: "It's a Sin." And so very, very sad.